Let’s Talk About Toxic Relationships with Professional Sista, Marsha Mclean

This is Marsha C. Mclean, your Professional Sista with a “Mental Health Moment”. Let's talk about ‘Toxic Relationships’. Both men and women experience these types of poisonous, destructive and sometimes dangerous dynamics. The term “toxic” is often loosely used but it is one of the most unhealthy holds that couples may face. 

There are many warning signs in a toxic relationship. Constant brutal and verbal attacks on one another can reveal that you are going down this path. Disagreements often rehash old issues and moving pass an experience seems difficult or impossible. Sometimes, a partner becomes overbearing and creates a relationship of isolation from the rest of the world. In other cases, doubt starts to become an issue and a toxic partner may question the belief system and loyalty of their significant other. A partner that is always checking your phone and accusing you of cheating is toxic. Trying to win instead of heal in an argument is a warning sign also. Yet there are times when you will win the argument against your toxic partner, simply because you have the evidence to prove them wrong. In this case, even in the face of complete evidence, they still may deny it. And of course, any physical abuse of any kind is toxic.

So,you may be asking, “what do I need to do to get out of this situation?” Here are some suggestions. It is time to step out of denial. Ask yourself:

•  Does this relationship feel like an obligation instead of a partnership?

• Do you feel drained after I leave your partner? 

If you answered “yes” to both questions it is time to move on. You must stand up for yourself and condemn their behavior. In some cases, your toxic partner may play the victim card and blame you for their actions. Stand your ground. There will be times when people notice your partner's toxic and vicious behavior, but ignore their wrongs. It is up to you to be your own advocate and not allow these embarrassing tactics to happen. Don’t make excuses for them. You are in a toxic relationship!

Surround yourself with positive people, keep a log on your emotion, and seek out support groups and a therapist specializing in toxic relationships.You can start your new chapter today. If you like my  “Mental Health Moment”, please follow me on IG @Professional_Sista and @Revivets.