Did you know that words represent only 7% of our communication? Most people think that they are communicating well if they’re saying the right words, in the right way. While being conscious of our words is important, if you are depending on only words For communication, you are missing 93% of the picture. Furthermore, most people think of communication as speaking, when just as important is the way we listen. The reality is most of our communication is nonverbal. That leaves a lot to be misinterpreted since most of the listening we do is with our ears. One of the foundational tools I teach in my NLP trainings is how to listen with more than just your ears, and communicate with more than just your mouth. Having learned those foundations, I go on to master the 7%… the use of our words to communicate consciously and effectively.

So what is this other 93% of communication that we are missing? Here are three:

Tone of voice – What you communicate can be very differently not only by what you say but how you say it. If you’re on Instagram or tick tock, there are a couple of reels that demonstrate this very well by putting vocal variety to the phrase “You good“ and the word “dude“. Vocal variety is one of the reasons that text messaging and emails can be frequently misinterpreted come on because you can’t control the tone that shows up in the head of the reader of your message. NLP training helps you detect (and utilize) the nuances of vocal variety so that you can have more effective and effortless conversations with people.Facial expression – While this is a bit more obvious, facial expressions are a good indicator of how someone is receiving her communication. This is why it’s important to observe people as you’re talking to them. They are subtle indicators of communication that will alert you to whether you’re empowering, inspiring, or offending the person you’re speaking to. Learning NLP helps you to be able to detect the micro-expressions in people as you speak so you can respond, gain clarification, or left up their non-verbal response and leave them feeling completely gotten.Body language – As important as facial expressions is body language. Oftentimes people will give you subtle somatic cues as to how they’re receiving your communication. Leaning may mean they are more interested while leaning out may indicate they’re putting some space between you. Leaning out or leaning back may also mean that they’re relaxing into the conversation. The crossing of arms could mean they’re closing themselves off to your communication. Noticing these little nuances makes you a more responsive listener even when you’re talking.

​These are just 3 of the common ways that people communicate without saying a word. When we listen only to the words, we fail to see the entire breadth of communication. In our NLP Certification training, you learn how to really expand your capacity to listen as well as master the words that you are using as well. Imagine the ways that this could benefit your life personally and professionally. For me, it has had a major impact on my relationships with my family (mom, and sisters) as well as my parenting and the relationship I have with my son. I also know that I am modeling this effective NLP communication because I see the changes in the communication of those closest to me. So if you want to master the full 100% of your communication, I’d invite you to consider learning NLP.

Want to learn more? Interested in becoming NLP certified? Learn more about our NLP Certification, Coaching, Time Line Therapy®, and Learn Hypnosis, and NLP training by visiting www.mindremappingacademy.com and www.drmaiysha.com.

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One of the most common questions I get asked as from future students today is how I got into NLP and why I decided to learn hypnosis. For those of you reading this who have not yet seen my previous articles, here’s a little review. Neurolinguistic programming is a system of processes, language patterns, and tools that help us to be in control of our inner state and outer behavior ultimately giving us the resources to create our lives powerfully. Many people also utilize these tools to help others get past their limiting beliefs, negative thinking, stuck emotions, and unresourceful habits helping them to move past their stuck points in life. 

For me, the choice to pursue NLP certification was initially purely a business decision. I felt like the NLP techniques could really benefit my patients and that I could use hypnosis to help the burned-out stressed and overworked professional moms I was seeing over and over again. However, what I did not count on is how learning neurolinguistic programming could make me more effective as a physician simply by giving me expanded personal flexibility of language, thought, and behavior. How exactly did that happen?

By giving me 4 major things:

It gave me a deeper understanding of myself. As you learn NLP you learn about how the brain processes information. In learning that, you learn a bit about why you think the way you think and where your own behavioral patterns come from. During the process, I came to recognize some of the programming I had inherited from not only my mom, but from teachers, culture, people in my generation, and society. Learning these things about myself gave me a clear understanding of what had been stopping me from reaching the fullest and most authentic expression of myself AND it gave me the tools to UN-learn many of these programs and install new and more empowering programming that let me be me. I found that in my most authentic expression, patients gravitated toward me. My practice grew exponentially because I practiced in a way consistent with my values (and no one else’s).It gave me tools for healing my past. When you start learning where your programming comes from it often brings up old wounds and emotions. In NLP we say the conscious mind will repress emotion and memories as a protective mechanism and will bring them back up when you are ready to resolve them. For most of the people I train, the NLP training is exactly the place where they become ready to resolve some of those old wounds. However, what’s different about this work is that because NLP is about the process and not content, you don’t have to relive past pain in order to heal it. So, during (and after) learning these tools the healing began, and continued. The more I practiced the tools, the more I healed. Now, it’s easier to recognize the old programming without the heavy emotion attached to it. And when emotion does come up, I have the resources and tools to heal it right away. Because I was able to recognize and heal my own past, I also became keen to others’ trauma responses. As a physician, that allowed me to respond in a more trauma-informed and compassionate way be with my patients.

It gave me a new language for myself and others. This may sound strange, however, the language we speak is limited by our past. When we are limited by our past it stunts our personal growth. Up-leveling ourselves means expanding our flexibility of thinking, speaking and behavior. Part of that is learning a new and more empowering language to use not only with ourselves (meaning our self-talk), but also learning a new expression to be with, inspire, influence, and empower others. After learning this new language, it became easier to navigate past the resistance of my patients (and later my coaching clients) to help them embrace change (whether it be healthy lifestyle or life transitions) in a more empowered way.It helped me to get a sense of my own values. After doing my master practitioner training in NLP I really got a deeper sense of my programs and what’s important to me. Having that awareness also gave me a deeper listening for others’ values. I could listen to my patients and hear beyond their complaints to what their true desire was and reframe it back to them. My patients felt seen and heard and ultimately that led them to not only be compliant but to return and refer their friends and family.

Ultimately, with these tools, I was able to align my values with my actions and that is what led me to leave medicine. Not everyone makes that choice, but for me I was called to a bigger purpose which is to teach these tools to others which is why I now run my own NLP certifications and Hypnosis trainings. Many of the physicians I have had the pleasure of coaching and training have shared the benefits of this work, and it seems only logical that if I (and they) have benefited from learning the tools of NLP, perhaps I could further positively impact our field by continuing to teach this work to physicians who see their value. What other profession can you see having the NLP training could benefit?

Want to learn more? Interested in becoming NLP certified? Learn more about our NLP Certification, Coaching, Time Line Therapy®, and Learn Hypnosis, and NLP training by visiting www.mindremappingacademy.com and www.drmaiysha.com.

Social emotional learning is a big term that is being used in the educational arena, and it is clear that empowering children’s social emotional learning will improve their resilience, readiness, and ability to thrive in society when they become adults. So, how can NLP training help that? Let’s break it down.

As I’ve shared in previous articles, NLP (which stands for neurolinguistic programming) is the study of how language impacts our brain… what we think, feel and do… and how our language influences our beliefs and behaviors. It takes scientific research of language, cognitive and behavioral science, neuropsychology, and neuroscience and it teaches the tools to increase our mental and emotional flexibility to deal with the circumstances and challenges of our lives.

Now, imagine children learning in elementary school how to automatically reframe negative thoughts, redirect their own unhelpful behavior patterns, and resolve conflict in a healthy manner. That would be incredible, right? This is the kind of thing my second-grade son is already doing because he is growing up in a household where the tools of NLP are being modeled to him (he is even trying to learn hypnosis to help get him to sleep some nights).

Educators are the gatekeepers of learning for our children. Most children spend 6-8 hours a day at school, and such much of the passive behavioral learning comes from interaction with their teachers, principals, assistant principals, and teaching staff. We know that developmentally children are sponges up until the age of 10 years old (prime learning time), and even after that, they are still soaking up learning by watching what we as adults do.

Furthermore, we know that while most teachers and educators have good intentions when it comes to their students, they may not always have the awareness, capability, or bandwidth to display emotional intelligence nor model trauma-informed interaction with the children. This is where learning NLP can be very valuable for educators. NLP not only increases mental and behavioral flexibility by giving an expanded set of language tools to use with children, it also helps to reframe the adult helping them to deal with their own limiting beliefs, biases, and unhelpful habits, thoughts, and behaviors.

A common barrier to people exploring the benefits of learning NLP is the false perceptions that people have about it. Similarly, these fears and false perceptions create hesitation for people to learn hypnosis. One of the most common questions I get is “Isn’t NLP mind control or manipulation?“ Now, while you might be expecting me to rebut and say “why no!!!” the answer is that it actually IS mind control BUT it’s that YOU are the one who is doing the controlling. And yes, it IS manipulation of the mind, but (and you might see this coming) you are learning to manipulate your own mind.

Let’s break this down.

Most people walk as if they are at the effect of their thoughts, beliefs, and feelings. Now, if it is your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings that drive your decisions and behaviors (conscious and unconscious) then you can imagine that most people are walking around as if they completely at the effect of their circumstances and they react and behave accordingly. This is not an empowering place to be.

However, a person who knows and understands truly what NLP is understands that one of the first assumptions of NLP is that you are in charge of your mind and therefore you are in charge of your results. And so someone with perhaps an NLP certification and training who gets into a space of “problem thinking” knows how to use the methodologies and tools of NLP to reframe themselves to a more resourceful place that allows them to move into “solution thinking” so that they can have the best outcome to their challenge. What did they just do? Manipulate their mind!

Let’s take a parent who teaches a child how to see things from a different perspective. I was playing basketball with my 7-year-old in the driveway a few months ago, and he was missing shots. After missing about 8 or 9 in a row, he got extremely frustrated. He threw the ball down and said “I’m so bad at this, I’m the worst!” So, instead of running to encourage him, I said to him “Wow you’re frustrated aren’t you.” He replied, “Yes, I feel like I’m never going to be able to make a basket”. And I said “Never? Ever? Ever?” and he said, “well, maybe if I practiced I could”. I said, “like you practiced Kung Fu and got better… got your yellow and then orange sash?”. He perked up and said, “Yeah, I guess”. I then said, “so what do you want to do?” He smiled and said…”keep going!” I gave him a few form tips, and he made the next shot…and the next… and the next.

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